Friday, June 20, 2008

A Horrible Story

I've been meaning to blog all week, but haven't gotten around to it yet (obviously). My sister and her kidlets came to visit and I have been spending my free time playing hide and seek and answering the question "But why are you going to work again?" every morning.

But I still want to blog and as it is almost exactly a year since the following incident happened, I thought I should repost it, just to spread my horror to more people. So, enjoy, and to quote one of my favorite professors, I must ask you not to scream.

OK. Check this out:

Fifteen minutes ago I'm walking downstairs to check my email. The light is off and I see a dark blob on the carpet. 90% of the time in a Middle Kingdom* summer, these blobs are kid-dropped raisins. This time it was HUGE FREAKING SPIDER. FAT AS A BASEBALL. I scream for my sister, who arrived from the shower. We stare in horror. She fetches my boot. I hold the boot and we cringe for ten minutes. Finally, I hit the spider and it gets so. much. worse.


Oh yes, friends, it was fat with babies. And so I sprayed them all with hastily-fetched bleach spray. And lo, they are dead and the hall smells like bleach.

Now we have to wait for it to dry so we can vacuum up mother and baby hoards. Seriously, I thought I had landed in a sci-fi channel original movie and the spider was really dead but was being eaten from the inside by nefarious parasite spider killers. I don't know which was worse."

Sometimes at night I can still hear the screaming.

*This originates from a funny boy I call Coop. Story will follow at a future date.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Year of a Million Souvenirs

I went to Disneyland a week ago, and I was planning to write a big ol' blog about it. But I'd rather watch a Disney movie so I'm just going to make a few points and post some pictures. Easier for everyone, right?

Favorite ride: Indiana Jones, followed by Pirates...and Splash Mountain. And Space Mountain. And Tower of Terror. ANYWAY. Indiana Jones was a blast.

Least favorite ride: what?

Tastiest food: I actually hardly ate anything the whole time I was there, but I did enjoy some turkey leg (mmm). The Dole pineapple whip was also very delectable. I also really liked the Starbursts I put in my bag.

Favorite souvenir: I only bought one, a Pirates hoodie. It was inevitable, but a Nightmare shirt almost won out. Actually, all of my souvenirs are my favorites--I also got a "1st visit" pin and my lovely sister-in-law traded a pin of hers to get me a neato Davy Jones pin.

A few of my favorite things:
--the first Jack Sparrow on Pirates.
--the "how do you do" song from Splash Mountain, although I prefer my version of "mighty fine shootin'" to "mighty fine greetin'".
--seeing a real live Ariel. There's some thrilling about seeing an animated character in real life. You know?

This all makes me sound like I was a total Pirates spaz at Disneyland, and, well, I was but I loved everything. I squealed about the castle, I got starry eyed in the princess store, I was enthralled by the videos at Off the Page and I seriously loved that Splash mountain song. So, just for the record, my Disney love goes well beyond Pirates territory. OK, picture time!


This isn't the Jack I mentioned, but it was the only one I could take a picture of. Yes, that is my hand, and no, I did not swoon. Giggle? Perhaps.

You know how on What Not to Wear they talk about flared jeans making your legs look stumpy? Um. They do.

Look! Princesses! I never saw Belle, which was too bad, but...princesses!

I was waiting for a rendezvous at Autopia and liked the palm trees.

This is one of my favorites, and sadly it came out a bit blurry.

Did I mention that I like the castle?

So, final thoughts: I want to go again. Very soon. But I want to go in the fall next time so I can see the Haunted Mansion all decked out Nightmare style. I also want to go on a weekend so I can see Fantasmic. And of course I want to go again so I can do all the things I missed and do all the things I liked all over again. Disneyland? Fall? Anyone?