Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Regarding the Speck

I wrote a whole post about this yesterday and then decided it sounded too whiny (probably because I was whiny yesterday).  Ohhhh, growing a human is hard?  Who knew??  Oh yeah, everyone.  Boo hoo hoo for me.  

But IS hard.  In some ways I expected, some ways not (though expecting a thing doesn't always make it easier to deal with).  Overall, I'm probably in the middle of the pack as far as symptoms go--not as bad as some, worse than others.  But since my discomfort means more to me than those some and others, that perspective was only helpful sometimes.

I have long had this secret belief/hope/expectation that all that (Irma-related) throwing up I did earlier in life meant that I would be exempt from it when it came to growing babies.  This...was not true at all.  Probably I should have assumed that because I threw up so much from Irma, I was even more likely to throw up now.  Apparently it's some kind of talent?  Go me?

But as uncomfortable and frustrating as the process can be, it is really amazing that this how new creatures are made.  And I mean that very generally (hence "creatures"), for all mammals.  I can sit here, twiddling my thumbs and my body will be, like, putting genes together and building kidneys with absolutely no conscious thought on my part.  Isn't that wild?  But it's also a good thing because my knowledge of genes can be summed up with "genes exist and are important."

It does make me wonder if there are mama bunnies out there with swollen ankles and food aversions. 

Of course, not every body can do this as readily or easily as others do.  Sometimes you have to get tennis balls and endometriosis and cysts taken out first.  Sometimes you have to do a lot more.  So, you, my friends who are still working on growing your own babies, I haven't forgotten you and I think of you often.  Success (and babies) will be yours one day--I really, truly have no doubt about that.
But back to this particular human I'm subconsciously growing.  I have been feeling him squirm around for a few weeks now, and yesterday I even SAW his pokes and prods.  So strange!  It's weird to me, still, that there's a person in there and one day in the future they'll be asking me if dinner is ready YET.  (And then, since the Speck is a boy, he will proceed to eat my share of dinner too and ask when there will be second dinner)

The whole boy thing makes me a *little* nervous.  But then I remember that I build awesome train tracks, and I already know the theme song to Thomas the Train, and I think dinosaurs are rad.  So we should be set.  One day, after he eats all my dinner, we'll watch Jurassic Park together. 

I also have to admit that one of my first thoughts was that I'm going to peed on!  I know, a terrible thought--after all there's NO bodily fluid worse than pee, right? (...)  I think I'm latching on to this fear because it's easier to deal with than my fear that I HAVE NO IDEA OF HOW TO CARE FOR A NEWLING INFANT.  (Or an oldling infant for that matter)  Luckily Drewbles has plenty of experience because I'm pretty sure I will resort to standing over yonder and just poking the thing with a stick.  


(I also worry that I'm going to lose my bum. D:)

It seems unfair to write all this about the Speck and not show a single picture of him.  Here he is, hungry as always!  (Always, always, always hungry.  Oh wait, that's me.)

Well.  Here's to just over the halfway point!  I can only hope it's all downhill from here...hah!  I'll settle for less vomity.  


  1. Yay for the manchild Speck! I know that feeling you're talking about (the one where you have no idea how you will care for an infant, not the vomity one, although I know that one too) and I promise you will figure it out. You'll start to know what his cries mean and when he needs to take a nap and when he wants to eat - sooner than you think, and it will BLOW YOUR MIND when it happens, almost as much as the human growing thing will. And there will definitely be days when you are exhausted and completely unsure of what to do and frustrated, but there will also be lots of days where you will be amazed that you are the one person who knows best what that little guy needs. I have no doubt you and Drew will be great parents! Here's to less vomiting and some pleasant 2nd trimesterness!

  2. Baby pee is sterile anyway - nothing to worry about!! And we--correction--I haven't been peed on yet. Curtis has been everythinged on.

  3. First off, Irma = nice reference! I also am impressed that all that growing happens with relative passiveness on the part of the mother. It's really awesome, actually. And it would be totally unfair if primates were the only mammals to endure swollen ankles. Damn you, fluffy bunnies!

    I know how you feel about the pukiness. My cramps are horrific every month, so I hope it's just my body conditioning itself for an eventual labor. Right? RIGHT??

    Anyway, keep up the good work!

  4. You are a champ! A moste splendide mother already. And don't worry, we'll figure things out as they come! I may have experience with little sisters and the occasional niece or nephew, but the whole parenting thing is 100% new to me too. What fun we'll have! I hope he still loves The Little Mermaid and Tangled even though he's a he (though I have my share of particularly boyish animated movies too).

  5. Congratulations to you and the Mister, my friend! I am so happy for you both to start the next adventure of life! And just think - maybe all the throwing up you've done is preparing you for all the bodily fluids that will come out of the little one...yeah, probably not. But here's hoping the hurling your guts out slows down/disappears very soon for you!

  6. A very nicely thought out post. Not being someone who naturally gravitates to kids (although I think they're cute), I totally understand the fear that you'll just stand a few feet away and poke Speck with a stick. I think I read somewhere that being nervous and having thoughts like these were signs that you were ready for the task at hand. At least, as ready/prepared as you can be. I'm sure you and the Mister will make excellent parents!